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Wednesday, January 9, 2013

um....so I'm making a testosterone machine

Well, if anyone cares to know, I'm having a boy.  Yippie??
Yeah great.  I wanted a girl.  I know, I know....I have a girl already.  I don't have a clue what to do with a boy.  Everyone says to me "boys are great.  They're so loving and sweet and fun...".
Blah, blah, blah. 
Boys are boys.  Boys are stupid.  I think of all of the things that my husband does that make me grip my forehead and wince while shaking my head in consternation, and think to myself "oh great, now I will get double of this".
There is nothing exciting for me about having a boy.  Girls are pretty, their clothes are precious, thier activities are endearing, and I am one so I can relate.
A boy?  My color choices are blue, and blue.  My decor choices are footballs and sailboats. 
No fun.
I think of all the things my brother did while we were growing up and I shudder.  Breaking things to see how they worked.  Throwing himself off of things because it looked like fun.  All kinds of cuts, scrapes, burns and stitches.  There were road flares involved.  :::Shudder:::
I never did anything like he did.  I had too much respect for pain, death and authority (til my teen years, but that's another story).  
My daughter is smarter than all that.  She doesn't do things that she shouldn't because she knows she shouldn't.  Boys don't work that way.  At least, not in my experience of boys.  They say "hey that looks fun" and jump out of a moving vehicle.  They don't think about the moving vehicle part, or the road rash part, or the possibility of death or dismemberment.  No. 
Because......boys are stupid.
Even naming this boy sucks.  There aren't any sweet, adorable boy names.  I'm not having fun with boy names.
People have asked me, "Are you upset that it's a boy?"
Of course I'm not upset.  It's not like I placed an order for a girl and got a boy instead.  You don't get a choice in the matter.
So instead of a room decorated in purples, I get blues.
Instead of adorable dresses I get cable knit sweaters.
Instead of dress up I get action figures smashing together in battle.
Instead of gymnastics and ballet I get football and wrestling.
Sigh.
And most unfortunately, instead of an easy choice in schools I get to fight with my husband about public school vs. private school.
So it begins....

1 comment:

  1. lollll I'm partially to girls too. We're just...better.

    ReplyDelete

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Shouldn't You Be Working by Bethany Davenport is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.